Wouldn't it be nice if a truly balanced life meant that all things went smoothly? Every activity, every responsibility, every challenge, every desire would come in a perfectly organized format so that it could fit sweetly according to schedule. I have learned (or relearned or maybe have come to accept) this week that true balance often comes from wreacking total havoc and then figuring out how to bring it all back into a balance of sorts, only in the stronger sense of the word.
Examples...let's start with school. I am enrolled in 4 classes (11 credits) this semester so as to FINALLY complete my associates' degree, with hopes of moving on to the "bigger and better" bachelors'. Two of these classes are institution-required busy work--LIB1010 (library) and CIS1200 (computers.) I had to decide whether to prolong the balance for 16 weeks of adding this busy work into my already cram-packed life, or tip the scale a little bit and get one of those classes out of my way. I chose the latter and worked all Saturday--the entire Saturday of not much else but listening to modules and taking quizzes--until I completed my entire LIB course!!! Woohoo! I guess I just have to take a final quiz now...but I am inspired now to do the same with CIS. My brain feels so much less congested now just knowing that I don't have to worry about it anymore!
Example #2...Diet (or "my step forward to a healthier lifestyle," as "Diet" is a bad word.) I have been almost religious in sticking to the Women to Women meal plans that I explained in my last post. I am actually enjoying having someone else tell me what to eat and trying new foods, although I will admit that this week has been a little harder for me. I'm not sure if it's because there were more "strange" choices this week than last week, or if it because I wasn't able to grocery shop until later in the week so I had to juggle days a little bit, or because I have been coming into the homestretch of PMS time, but some days were harder to conform to than others. (Let's say nothing about the amazing homemade donuts that my visting teacher brought that I could not just let pass ungratefully by ...I enjoyed only one, and I DO NOT regret one bite!) And then I read a tweet from a friend that said she had lost over 5 pounds, in I swear it was one day, because she was "eating clean and exercising." GRRRR! I let myself become frustrated because I have hardly seen any change in my body composition or in my weight in 2+ weeks! I then allowed myself to "binge" (well, this was a very mild form or binging if you were to compare it to binges of my previous life.) I went to dinner with Dave (which, remember, I had allowed as part of my total balance goal) and then we went to Orange Peel and a movie. In my rebellion, I had a (vegan) macadamia nut cookie, a large avocado and coconut bubble tea, and a fair amount of popcorn. I didn't even feel remorse...until I realized that I felt SICK! Ugh, rapid weight loss or not, I remember now how much better I FEEL when I eat (mostly) clean. So, the moral of this balance story is to remember WHY I am doing things. Yes, stubborn fat loss is an ultimate goal, but feeling good is a much bigger part of that goal. I must add that feeling good emotionally--by feeling good about ME as I AM--is just as important as feeling good physically. That is true balance.
Example #3...Business(es): I have had this 5 year quandry of having two amazing business opportunities in my life. How the heck to you balance that? I believe in BOTH companies so much! They are totally unrelated, and because I think I am superwoman, I have thought on several occasions that I would work both of them without a conflict of interest. I didn't include MY TIME in that "lack of conflict." It is a huge conflict regarding time. I have to admit, I still struggle in this area of balance. For the most part, I have let my husband run the Isagenix business (at which he is incredible) while I vascilate between powerhousing and piddling around with Heritage Makers. This Heritage Makers teeter totter is not from lack of confidence in the company, but maybe more from lack of confidence in myself or even lack of conviction in what I am really supposed to do. My family is really my number one priority--both companies support family. One would argue, and I see the point, that working either business actually helps my family! Forget the amazing health that Isagenix promotes or the self esteem and powerful family connection that Heritage Makers offers; the financial benefits alone will bring freedom and opportunity to my family in a way that nothing else could! But with both parents pursuing success in business, what does that do for the spiritual bond or the day-to-day functionality of my family? MANY can and do make it work, and I don't doubt that I can as well, but first I need to reconnect to that balance...hence the purpose of this Balance Project!
SO, long story made not quite so long (leaving out the fact that Mekenze has decided to work isagenix and a few other recent experiences with both companies,) I have strong feelings that I am supposed to be involved in both--at least for now. I have decided that in order to really know which is the right path for me, I will do "one thing HM" and "one thing ISA" every day. Maybe I am to remain "slow and steady" in both areas for now, so as to actually reach a balanced life...who knows? All I know is that I will continue as I am until I feel prompted to make a change. I have been able to keep my house clean(er) again, so that, to me, is a good sign!
PS--on the enjoyment side of things, I had a really great voice lesson Friday. I will have to make it another post of its own someday soon. I also found a yoga program on TV that I recorded and have added yoga to my workout routine. Someday I will add zumba too, just to say that I overcame that fear...I'll keep ya posted!
2 comments:
i love reading your balance journal..very honest and insightful!! you are amazing!!
You are amazing!! I can't believe all you can do. You're definitely right about the balance, though.
I read a book recently in which the author's main purpose (or for me anyway), was to "expose" the myths of perfection and that kind of thing. It made me think of balance, and the main thing I got out of the book was that I am a human being. Sounds silly, but the author stated well-known facts such as human beings make errors, there is no such thing as human perfection, we fail, etc. I came out of that book realizing that I'm human. And that's OKAY. The other thing he pointed out is that we have good days & bad days. Again, obvious, but his point was that "doing your best" varies just like the day varies. If all you can do is pull together a frozen pizza for dinner because it's just been that kind of day, you can still feel good about it because you're actually doing the best you can on that particular day given your particular circumstances. I'm probably not summarizing this too well (and I'm going to blog about this book in another week or two), but I think the main "give yourself a break" idea helps me personally when things don't go as planned and when things get frustrating.
So impressed you did your LIB course in basically one day. WTG!! Busy work like that has got to be doubly frustrating when you have such other important things to do.
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