I don't know if Labor Day started it off, but this week had the appearance of balanced but the feeling of frazzle to the point of declaring Saturday "I'm not the Mom" day. :) Yes, I speak in the extreme, but some moments feel extreme, don't they?
Can I blame my kids? Either someone forgot to tell them that I am on a balance journey, or they chose not to listen. Labor Day weekend turned into a sleepover marathon...one friend slept over both Saturday and Sunday night out of necessity, so the other friend(s) should have to sleep over to be fair, right? So, jobs were done, tho quickly, but the house was forever chaotic. Don't get me wrong; I enjoy having my kids' friends over, and these particular friends are very enjoyable, but too many movies after midnight in the backyard with a projector can make for a too many sleepless nights.
So maybe it was the lack of sleep that helped me NOT include my kids in the "plan" the way I should have done. I feel like I was FOREVER in the car, running back and forth on the same road because when one person was supposed to be somewhere, the other wasn't ready to go yet, although she needed to be somewhere in that same vicinity within the same half hour. Why did I not insist (or "persist to insist" might be the better way to word it?) Your guess is as good as mine. I repeated the question aloud to myself over and over as I made umpteen trips. I ENJOY taking my kids to their extracurriculars, and I INSIST that they have something to be passionate about, but when appreciation is replaced by expectation, I become irritated. I'm sure the expectation comes from my "give-in-ability," and I find myself kicking myself to the curb over it. By the time Dave got home, I was so frazzled and ornery, with no desire to step into a car, but of course there was taking to and from the Friday-night-fun because apparently no other kids have parents who can drive. (I'm typing as my ornery-warped mind was thinking at the time...kinda sounds ridiculous now.) Needless to say, I declared Saturday "I'm not the Mom Day" and refused to drive anyone anywhere. I thought would lock myself in my office and do homework/storybooking/scanning all day, but instead I hung out with Dave. We went to gym, went to dinner, watched a movie...and it was just what the doctor ordered. I felt "Cruella" relax back into "Me" again.
This lesson on balance could then be called, "Balance between Cruella and...um...I'm sure there is a Disney character out there who overindulges her children..."OR it could be called "Explaining the Balance Plan to Your Children BEFORE You Go Off-Balance!"
In the health and fitness world, I thought I did quite well. I recorded yoga and aerobics (Gilad Janklowitz--love him!) on my DVR so that I could have something to "switch it up" on the days that I can't go to crossfit. I feel like my body needs different movements, something a little more "graceful," (and I use that term lightly) mixed into the heavy lifting and anaerobic "power moves" (also used lightly) of crossfit. (I am hoping that this--especially the yoga--will help the muscles around my knee loosen up and I can overcome my IT band knee issues.) AND I went to zumba with my cousin Tawsha. Yes, I did it, AND I enjoyed it! My hips don't move like that, I looked like a fool, and my knee didn't like me so much for a day or two afterwards, but I am sure I will go again. My nutrition plan is getting easier, and I kinda-sorta think I might be noticing a slight change in my body shape. I don't quite dare say it out loud yet for fear of jinxing it, so shhhh...but... fingers are crossed.
One more thing: I have always KNOWN, but it has been reaffirmed to me through my college-aged kids, that the most important element in staying balanced is CHURCH! More specifically, the gospel. Making sure that we are staying connected to heaven through scripture study, weekly church meetings, prayer, partaking of the Sacrament, living the commandments, etc brings peace to our lives. I, for one, can feel the immediate difference if I miss a week of church. One of my daughters is having a hard time finding transportation to church in the city where she lives, and the burdens of life are wearing on her. I am praying that she can find a way soon! I know she will find relief...)
1 comment:
I get pretty ornery when it comes to the car. I, too, don't mind taking people to things (and they don't even DO half of what your kids do), but I *hate* wasting my time and feeling like other people don't respect my time or my service. So I consider us both "normal." :) I'm glad you spent time with Dave. That is always my answer, too--running away with Kevin. Even if it's not for more than a couple hours. Still helps.
Talking to them about your balance goal may have helped, but if your kids are like my kids (though they're probably not), they may not really SEE the correlation between their actions and your balance. At least mine never do.
WTG on the yoga & zumba. I did zumba ONCE and felt like such an idiot I never tried again.
You're right, of course, on the spiritual. Without that, it doesn't matter what else we do.
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