Never A Greater Feeling!

I am feeling so blessed right now! I wish I could go into details about why, but maybe if I talk around it enough...

It all starts with having kids. When they are small you think they are the world...well because they basically ARE to you..and you think they think YOU are the world...and maybe they do, for a little while. But then they grow up, and things change somehow. The kids' world starts to grow, and you become not much more than a small speck on that world, while at the same time, your world grows so much smaller until soon the kids are able to just step on it and crush it. The saddest part is that they often DO!

But you know, it's all good because at least you taught them correctly and they will always remain true to the truth...go forth with faith and never make a wrong choice...except for the times that they DO, because (Dang It!) they WILL!

The realization that your kids are people too is a wicked awesome realization, and I mean that VERY literally! Let's take all of the emotion of "awesome"--your kids are beautiful, talented, strong adventurous people who have every capability of taking the world by storm--and stir in a cup or two full of all the emotions that "wicked" can conjure--these people you call your kids have their agency and it is time for them to wean themselves off of your testimony and find their own in a world that shouts every exciting and glamorous untruth imaginable (cue the "great and spacious building.") It is an emotional rollercoaster, at one moment a heart-wrenching concoction that resembles the bitter cup and the next a glorious magical trip to Willie Wonka's Chocolate Factory. (Are you getting the imagery?)

There once was a time when you could affix curfews and create incentive charts that rewarded them when they were good and punished them with they made unwise choices. But now, suddenly, you are left to stand by and watch as the world attaches these consequences, both wonderful and not so much...instead of to parenting books, you now turn to your Heavenly Father. PLEASE help them remember! Please touch their hearts and help them make all the right choices! P.L.E.A.S.E...?!!?

Now that you are (hopefully) getting the picture...I just need to say that right now I see my kids-turned-adults DOING IT! They are finding their testimonies and aligning their lives to what they know to be true. It is glorious and beautiful!

Some Little Good News-es

Karter started Kombat Kids. It is a mini MMA class (right now it is actually a one on one private training because it is a new class and he is the only one--pretty cool) and it is a pretty good work out for him. He really likes it, especially since his big brother is taking similar classes.

Madyson was chosen to be Snow Queen in the Nutcracker portion of the Diamond Talent Christmas show. She is a beautiful dancer and I can't wait to see the show.

Curtis has been working out a lot and taking MMA fighter training. He really loves it and is getting quite good and thinking through and coming out on top.

Arielle does not have cancer! That is a happy thing!

The doctor thinks her pain and other symptoms have something to do with her digestive tract. She did colon cleanse today...we will see if it helps her.

Hopefully the pain will go away and we can end our worries and experimental visits to doctors...

(she'll kill me if she finds out I posted this picture, but it's a pretty good illustration of how she has been feeling...)

Mekenze turned 20! and she spent her big day in Florida at Disneyworld Resort being treated like a queen. I want to give more information as to WHY she was there, but I think it needs to be a secret for now. But she had the time of her life and said that the whole experience set a new precedence for the rest of her life. How cool is that?

A Little Good News...

I realize that the freeze frame of the video I posted in my last blog was a little...umm...questionable, so today I am posting something happy to move it from my opening page. :)

One of my all-time favorite songs, sung by one of my all-time favorite singers, is "A Little Good News" by Anne Murray. In 2009, she did a remake with the Indigo Girls:

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Whenever I start to feel the weight of the world on my shoulders, I sing this song and I try to list all of the "good news" I can think of. Here goes!

1. I took my algebra test and I think I did well!
2. I remembered to pick Karter up for MMA and to take Mady to dance all in the same run...
3. Karter went to MMA and had a really great workout!
4. Arielle felt good (for the most part...after this morning) today!
5. I am actually making dinner. :)
6. Mekenze is making some good life decisions and is feeling excited about life.
7. I talked to my sister, Dani, on the phone.
8. I got to visit with a friend I haven't seen in awhile.
9. The weather today was FANTABULOUS!
10. Tonight Curtis and I will watch House, MD. :)

Do you have any good news? I would love to hear it!!!

The World Is Too Much With Us...

I have so many things on my mind ALL THE TIME and when I sit down to blog about them, they disappear. I'm going to sit here and just type until I access that black hole of my mind.

I have two videos that I want to post, because I know many of my thoughts this week have been centered on those:


"Miss Representation"


This video shouldn't be shocking, but the way it is put together really got me thinking.

The second one is so cute, equally as powerful, and could possibly be an answer to prayers.

"Worth Waiting For"
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There was a time that my kids never wanted to bring their friends to our house to "hang out." I understood--I was the oldest child and I know how "annoying" little brothers and sisters can be--but I really wished they would bring their friends home so I could meet them. Now that my kids are older, this has changed dramatically. We have done a lot to our house to make it more appealing to the kids, and I really believe it has helped them want to be here. I have a houseful of teenagers at my house almost all of the time. Some of them call me (different versions of) mom, and I love it! Having them here has also tuned me more into the world that these kids live in. All of the messages that are constantly surrounding them: the movies, the music, the fashions... I can understand why living a virtuous life can seem "lame;" girls who dress modest are not necessarily seen as "hottest;" drugs and vulgar language are everywhere and it's "no big deal;" music is more fun when the beat is loud and fast and the lyrics don't matter...

I'm not saying that my kids (or my newly adopted kids) are bad kids. On the contrary, they are AMAZING and valiant and vulnerable and impressionable and ... sigh ...

I am not a worryer. It is not in my nature to be paranoid, but I feel the weight of the world on their shoulders. How do I help them to seek after things that are "virtuous, lovely, of good report, or praiseworthy?" (besides moving to the hills and living in seclusion, that is...)

Needless to say, my prayers are becoming way more specific and fervent.

Familiar Road?

Do you ever feel like life is changing, like your routine is all of a sudden confused and you are not sure why but you can feel you are being prepared for something? I have felt this way for at least 5 months--starting with the Pioneer Trek--like I was being prepared for something hard...

Well, it might be that time. Last week, we took Arielle to the urologist, Dr Cope, for what we thought was a kidney stone. Because she has only one kidney, he scheduled her for emergency surgery the next morning, then sent her to the hospital to have a ct scann and a KUB xray, along with blood work, so he could know the exact location and size of the stone.

Well, there is no stone...but her spleen is enlarged and her white blood cell count is elevated. Dr Cope sent her to see Dr Frame, a doctor of internal medicine. After reviewing her symptoms, he asked her if she has looked any of them up online. When we told him that she had, he asked what she found. She told him "leukemia" and other "scary stuff" and he nodded his head. Then he stepped out to talk to his partner. It all seemed so familiar! UGH!!

He sent us to the hospital lab to get tested for leukemia. They also did a sed rate and ebv panel. And it is going to take a week to get the results...

So here we wait. She keeps having pain and fatigue and weakness. She has called in sick to work and has come home early from work. It is frustrating because she just bought a car and needs to work. What if she loses her job? And then I get frustrated because that is awful for me to be worrying about that...

But, if we get the results and find ourselves on the cancer road, we will be ready and willing to face it and take it, and she will beat it--again.

Get Away, Get Away, Get Away-way

2 weeks ago I told Dave that I had completed my application for graduation in December, and he decided it was a good reason to celebrate and GET AWAY for a weekend. He told me to go online and find a room at the Anniversary Inn in Salt Lake City and reserve it! I was so excited and have been looking SO forward to it!




I didn't stop to think about how much homework I had, how many tests and papers would be due on the following Monday, or of a few other things that might come up on my calendar, nor did I realize that Arielle would be struggling with a kidney stone this very weekend...I am glad I didn't, because I probably would have decided I couldn't go. Sometimes one just needs to DO IT, regardless...and heavens knows that WE DID need to JUST DO IT!


We have had a really good time doing nothing more than walking around temple square, listening to conference, walking around the Gateway Mall, watching movies, eating too much, and relaxing. I feel reconnected to my husband and to myself. Good feeling.



Here are a few random photos:

We drove to Salt Lake City in my new car! 2007 Nissan Altima. I love it! It is fun to drive, and the gas mileage was amazing compared to what I am used to with my van.

We ran into the Harding family in the Tabernacle on Temple Square. This was during the 2nd session of the semi-annual conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

I loved this sight! So many people gathered on the temple grounds to hear the word of God through his prophets and apostles. This is not counting the thousands who are inside the conference center, tabernacle, and Seagull House. Reminds me of the scripture in Isaiah that talks about multitudes gathering in the mountain tops to hear the word of God.

Just another view of the multitudes!

This is our 2nd room at the Anniversary Inn--the Bridal Veil Falls room. We thought it would be fun to switch rooms so that we could experience more of the fun decor.

We are not used to eating breakfasts like this. Isn't it a gorgeous spread? (taste buds were happy; stomachs a little confused...ha ha)

Here is a view from our first room--the Carriage Suite.
So cute!

Famous Dave's. Enough said...

A Few Notes from the General Relief Society Broadcast

I have been so ornery today! (I think it is in partly because yesterday I totally indulged in way to many yummy yet deadly foods, all involving white sugar and/or white flour.) But I realize even more strongly that it is due to losing some of the balance that I have been so desperately seeking. Sure, I have been going through the motions, but sometimes (more often than not) I forget the WHYs of what I am doing. Especially when it comes to things of the Spirit (my favorite part of life!)

I just watched the General Relief Society annual broadcast. It was wonderful. Here are just a few of the incredible words that were spoken:

Julie B Beck, Relief Sociey General President

We need to a render more service, sincerely come to know each sister, do the things He would do if He were here, concentrate more on caring about our sisters more than our busy lists of things to do, help people grow spiritually (focusing on visiting teaching, but to me it also means throughout life!)

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Silvia H Allred, First Counselor in the General Relief Society Presidency

The first presidency has requested that we study the new Relief Society book "Daughters in My Kingdom" about the history of the Relief Society organization.

We learn that Charity is not a single act or something we give a way, but a way of living. How do we receive charity? Have a sincere desire, pray to be filled with Christ's love, read the scriptures daily to acquaint ourselves with the Savior's charitable examples. Joseph Smith showed charity, and Thomas S Monsen is a perfect example of charity to us today. Charity is having patience with someone who has let us down, refusing to be offended easily, seeing people as they really are, looking past physical appearances. When we serve others with charity, we serve when it is not convenient, not expecting the act to be reciprocated.

Acts of charity soften hearts. Acts of charity are guided by the Savior's examples. Providing charity helps us to overcome our own difficulties and make them seem less challenging.

Joseph Smith said, "If you live up to these principles (of charity,) how great will be your joy in the Lord's Kindgom." (paraphrased...)

All acts of charity have a healing power.

All of us should pray for charity. The Lord will crown our efforts with success.

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Barbara Thompson, 2nd Counselor in the General Relief Society Presidency

If ye will cleave unto thy God, the destroyer will have no strength over thee. Retire with prayer and thy heart will be comforted.

The temple endowment brings us out of darkness and into marvelous light.

We covenant to give up all that we are, all that we possess for the Kingdom of God. Great are the blessings we receive when we cleave unto our covenants.

Joy comes from faithfulness in keeping in the commandments of God. Ammon said "How great reason we have to rejoice. My joy is full. Yay, my heart is filled with joy...." as he brought thousands unto Christ.

When members of the church keep their covenants, they feel tremendous joy amid the trials they face. "We know God will guide us and sustain us..."

Temples allow the Lord to pour out His blessings upon His people.

When people sift through our belongings after we have died, will they find evidence that we have kept our covenants?

Keeping our covenants is joy and peace, protection, and joy in times of trial.

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Forget Me Not: doesn't attract immediate attention, but has a hounding plea in its name.

5 petals, 5 symbols:

Forget not to be patient and compassionate with yourself. God is fully aware that you and I are not perfect. Neither are the people that you think are perfect. yet we spend so much time and energy comparing ourselves to others, usually comparing our weaknesses to their strengths. It is wonderful that we have strengths and part of God's plan in our mortal existence to have weaknesses. One day, God plans to turn all of our weaknesses into strengths, but we are not there yet. Be patient and compassionate with yourselves. Celebrate the tiny successes and may, like the forget me not, may seem to go unnoticed, but God notices everything.

Forget not the different between a good sacrifice for a foolish sacrifice. Losing a few hours of sleep sitting with a child having a nightmare--good sacrifice. Staying up all night to make an accessory for her sunday dress--foolish sacrifice. :)

Forget not to be happy now. We are often looking for that "golden ticket." One woman lookes so forward to being married. She would be the perfect mother and wife, with lots of children who preferred to spend all of their time with mom and dad. This was her golden ticket. but it never happened. She couldn't understand why God would not grant this righteous desire, and she became bitter. She worked with children at school, but was disliked by them and was often mean to them. This circumstance caused her to miss the opportunity to influence hundreds of children for good as a teacher. If we spend all our days looking for the beautiful bouquet of roses, we may miss the forget me nots. Never stop wishing for all the righteous desires, but don't close your heart to all of the beauty and sweetness of every day moments. Weave a tapestry of gratitude and wonder to be truly happy.

Forget not the WHY of the gospel of Jesus Christ. We sometimes see the gospel as a long list of tasks to add to our already long to-do list. We focus on what and how to do what the Lord wants us to do, but we sometimes forget WHY! The gospel is not an obligation. It is a pathway, marked by our loving Heavenly Father, leading to happiness and peace in this life and glory and inexpressable fulfillment in the life to come. The eternal fire and majesty of the gospel springs from the why. Let us not walk unaware of the beauty of the glorious earthly and spiritual landscapes that surround us. Seek out the exhilarating joy . It will inspire and uplift you! The what and how of obedience marks the way and keeps us on the right path, but the why of obedience sanctifies our actions, transforming the mundane into the majestic. it magnifies our small acts of obedience into holy acts of consecration.

Forget not that Heavenly Father knows, loves, and cherishes you.

We are not forgotten of the Savior! no matter how dark things me seem, how insignificant you may feel, you are known and remembered by the most majestic and powerful being of the Universe. He knows our name. We are the daughters of His Kingdom. We are closer to heaven than we suppose. We are destined for more than we can imagine. Treasure the gift of membership in this glorious and true church. Continue to seek out those who need your help.

Never forget that you are a precious daughter in the Lord's kingdom.

There is something inspiring and sublime about the little forget me not flower. Let it be a symbol of the little things that make your life joyful and sweet.